I was reading Candy Mag’s April 2012 ish this morning when a certain article caught my attention. The title is “Last and Least” written by Micah Sulit and it tackles about the experiences of people who are left out when parents, friends or teachers play favorites.
It’s really hard when you are the one in the shadows because no matter what you do, people will only notice those who are in the limelight since the day they were born.
Sometimes, we only hear the sentiments of the ones who are being left out. We listen to their dramas and sometimes, their anger towards those who are considered as ‘role models’. However, have we ever looked at the other side of the coin?
Micah also shared a story of a guy who has been a teacher’s pet due to his high grades. He even received an unsolicited favor that made him feel guilty. This reminded me of a situation that happened to me way back in college.
I am not saying that I’ve been a teacher’s pet too. In fact, I never was. But, I am someone that teachers expect to get high grades during exams.
[Sige, ako na mayabang. LOL] I am not saying
either that I am really academically good as how they see me. I’m not. I like to read, yeah, but I hate memorizing.
When we have exams, I browse my notes but when I feel like I no longer
comprehend what I was reading, I go to sleep. That was basically my study
habit---browse, read then sleep.
One particular day, we had a written exam in one of our major subjects. I didn’t really review for that because I was fed up with other school stuffs. I just prayed that the question I’d get was one I’m familiar with. Unlucky I was, I picked up a tough question. Duh. We were only given ten minutes to answer that exam. Time was ticking and I still hadn’t written anything on my answer sheet. Just so I wouldn’t pass an empty paper, I scribbled some words then submitted it.
Guess what? I received a grade of 75%. Still PASSED. I was kind of shocked because I was expecting a 60%. I felt guilty, really.
It is really hard to live up to what people expect from you. When you are the one they look up to, you are supposed to stay on top. It’s hard because they give you no room for any mistake. You are their Ms./Mr. Perfect who live in a box made up of standards they want out of you.
In conclusion, being in the shadows or being the role model has its own pros and cons. But instead of lurking in its cons, why not use it to grow? If you are the less favored, you have the chance to prove that you are capable of doing something else; that you are amazing in your own way. You don’t need to please everybody; just take it positively and make the most out of it. Forgiveness is also essential so you could move forward without any anger in your heart. Forgive those people who belittle you and thank those who believed in you. On the other side, when you are the one on the limelight, use it as a way to encourage others to do and be their best. Don’t be a brat just because you are favored; rather, be a fully functional adult. =)